


Conversations and Coffee

by CrimsonShield75



Series: Mass Effect Fictober 2019 [1]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Adorable, Angst, Autumn, Autumn Leaves, Coffee, Conversations, F/M, Fictober, Fictober 2019, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Mass Effect 1, Normandy-SR1, Sole Survivor (Mass Effect), Vancouver
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-02
Updated: 2019-10-02
Packaged: 2020-11-15 10:35:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20864801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrimsonShield75/pseuds/CrimsonShield75
Summary: Dani Shepard and Kaidan Alenko are just starting to get to know one another. Backgrounds and families are explored over a late night cup of coffee.





	Conversations and Coffee

**Author's Note:**

> My first entry for Mass Effect Fictober 2019! I shall hopefully be posting every day, so check back here for my daily posts of drivels and ficlets. 
> 
> Today's prompt: Autumn Leaves 
> 
> Also, I seem to be getting inspired by music. All my posts may not have a song to go along with it, but this one does!  
Song: "It's Nice To Have A Friend" - Taylor Swift 
> 
> Just a note: Mature rating for cursing

Dani Shepard walked into the comm room, hoping to call up Captain Anderson and get his take on the situation on Noveria. She knew she did the right thing, releasing the Rachni Queen, but the Council’s reaction to her actions now had her second-guessing herself. She needed some reassurance that her decision had been the right move. And she didn’t know anybody who could do that for her better than Anderson. 

She still wasn’t getting the hang of this whole Spectre thing yet, apparently. 

When the door to the comm room opened, however, she realized her call would have to wait, as the space wasn’t unoccupied. She heard voices speaking from inside. 

“Don’t work too hard,” a female voice with a soft timbre said. It had the slight electronic sound that immediately told Shepard the voice was coming from one of the vid screens set up around the room. 

“I won’t, Ma,” said the other voice, this one much closer - on the Normandy - and extremely familiar to Shepard. She had heard that voice over her commlink in her hard suit too many times to count. She also looked forward to hearing that husky baritone more than she wanted to admit, with it sometimes invading her dreams and idle thoughts. 

Like it was doing now, as she realized the conversation between her staff lieutenant and his mother had ended, and silence now filled the room. 

Horrified, she looked over to where Kaidan was sitting, only to notice he was standing now and giving her a salute. 

“At ease, Lieutenant,” Shepard immediately said, hating that she caused that reaction in her shipmates and friends. She wanted to be respected, sure, but at what cost? Friendships, comraderies, romances? 

She shook her head to clear her thoughts, not wanting to go down that path of thinking at the moment. She looked over to her fellow officer and noted that, while he had stopped saluting, he was still standing, somewhat at attention. 

“I didn’t make you end your call prematurely, did I? I’m sorry, I didn’t check to see if the room was scheduled for use before I came here. I should have done that,” she added, more to herself than to the lieutenant. 

“No, ma’am, we were just finishing up anyway when you entered,” Kaidan responded. 

“Please, call me Shepard,” she said, waving her hand dismissively. Then she stopped herself from speaking and her eyes went wide. 

_ “What the hell, Dani?” _ she thought. _ “Way to break protocol.” _

Kaidan, for his part, just answered with a simple, “Ma’am?” 

Shepard sighed, running her hand over her forehead, a nervous tic she picked up from her time in the Alliance. 

“Sorry, Lieutenant,” she said, grimacing inwardly at the disappointment she could hear in her voice. Embarrassed, she turned on her heel and quickly headed for the door. 

* * *

“Wait,” Kaidan called after her. He caught up with her just as she reached the threshold, grabbing her upper arm to stop her. “I could call you Shepard, when we’re off duty. If you want,” he quickly amended his statement. 

_ “What the hell, Kaidan?” _ he thought to himself, as he noticed his hand on his commander’s body and quickly withdrew it. _ “Why’d you go and say that? Now you’re going to get a reprimand on your record for insubordination. You’re better than that,” _ he admonished himself. 

He waited with baited breath to see her reaction, to find out what the great Commander Shepard would do to someone who touched her without her permission. 

To his utter surprise, she just smiled slightly. “I think I’d like that,” she said. 

“Great,” Kaidan replied, smiling himself. Then the two stared at each other silently for a few moments. 

Thankfully, his commander broke the awkward silence by nodding her head toward the door. “Wanna grab a cup of coffee?” she asked. 

“Don’t you have your call?” Kaidan asked in reply, mentally cursing himself for giving her a reason to get out of spending time with him. 

“Nah, it wasn’t anything official. Just looking to get an opinion on the last mission,” she said, biting her lip. 

Kaidan’s eyes were drawn right to that action, but he forced himself to look her in the eyes. Her big, beautiful, hazel eyes. “I could give you my tactical appraisal. Ma’am. Shepard,” he added and amended, inwardly wincing at forgetting her request. 

Shepard gave him a small smile again. He liked that he could make her smile. 

“Sure, I’d be interested in what you have to say. Over that cup of coffee? I really could use the caffeine,” she said. 

Kaidan chuckled softly at her confession and added that to the short mental list of things he knew about Commander Shepard that he started when he realized he would be serving under her. As staff lieutenant, it was his job to know the crew - and he counted the commander as part of that responsibility. 

The trouble was, she was incredibly tight-lipped about her past, and nobody really knew anything about her. 

Of course her service record was available to him - the non-N7-classified stuff - so he knew about Akuze, but not much else was known about what made the great Commander Shepard tick. 

* * *

Shepard didn’t know what she was thinking, inviting the Lieutenant to have a cup of coffee with her. 

_ “It’s just a meeting between two coworkers, not a date,” _she told herself. Even though she knew it was a lie. Or so she hoped. Maybe Kaidan really did just want to give her his opinion on what she did with the Rachni Queen. 

She led the way down to the mess hall, a comfortable silence settling between the two of them. Kaidan told her to sit down at the table while he went to make the coffee for her. 

“I can do it,” she protested, not wanting him to think he had to serve her. 

“My parents like to drink coffee, and they passed on that habit to me. So I know a thing or two about making a good cup,” he said, as he began to rummage around the galley area for ingredients. 

“Your parents, they’re back on Earth, right?” she asked, taking a seat at the table. 

“Yes, ma’am. Shepard,” he corrected himself quickly. It made Shepard smile to know he took her request so seriously. “They live in Vancouver.” 

"That must be nice…” she said, trailing off. _ “Keep it together, Dani. You put what happened to your parents behind you a long time ago.” _

“That’s who I was talking to on the vidcall. My mom,” Kaidan continued, and Shepard was incredibly thankful that he didn’t comment on her forlorn sentiment. 

“Yeah?” Shepard asked, trying to keep present and engaged. 

“Yeah. She’s very proud of me and my Alliance enlistment – my father served. But it’s not like there’s really many other career options for biotics,” he said. 

“I know what you mean,” she agreed, causing her hand to glow slightly blue. She held it in front of her, staring at it. No matter how many times she saw herself use her biotics, it still shocked her that it was her body causing those things to happen. 

“Are your parents on Earth?” he asked, coming over with two mugs of steaming hot liquid in his hands. 

The question took her by surprise – most soldiers she served with knew her – and knew her history. They knew that she was the sole survivor of the massacre on Mindoir. After all, her name and face were plastered all over the Alliance News Network for months. Was it truly possible that he didn’t know who she was? Or was this some sort of test he was conducting?

She felt the dull ache that she associated with any conversation about her parents start to pulse in her chest. She knew she should be over their deaths – it happened over 10 years ago. But she never truly got closure, never truly was able to wrap her head around the fact that her entire colony – her entire family – was gone forever. 

She gratefully accepted the mug he offered her, taking a sip. Fresh cinnamon and cloves of cardamom were sprinkled into the drink. The spices took her by surprise, but she really liked them. 

Shepard sat quietly, sipping her coffee, thinking about how to approach the question asked.

* * *

_ “Shit,” _ Kaidan thought, taking a sip of his own hot beverage. He enjoyed the sweet tang of the spices he added on his tongue. _ “She’s not talking. Did I do something wrong?” _ He decided to steer the conversation in another direction. 

“Sorry, Shepard, you don’t have to answer that if you don’t want to,” he said quietly. 

She looked up at him and he could swear he could see gratitude shining in her eyes. “Thank you,” she said, just as quietly. “What’s in this, anyway?” she asked, lifting up her mug slightly to indicate what she was talking about. 

“Cinnamon and cardamom. An old family recipe. We don’t always spice our coffee, but it’s something we do in the fall and winter,” he answered, smiling. He was glad she was still talking, even if he didn’t find out anything about where she was from. 

“So why put it in my cup? We don’t have seasons here,” Shepard asked. 

Kaidan smiled a bit more widely. “Well it _ is _ fall. Back in North America anyway. I could see the trees in the background of Mom’s vid screen. Beautiful autumn colors of reds and greens, yellows and oranges. They’re really quite something. I loved autumn in Vancouver. Jumping in the piles of leaves, crunching a leaf under my foot, capturing their beauty in a picture…” he trailed off, realizing he was going on about the trees too long. “Anyway, seeing the trees put me in the fall mood. So I wanted to have my fall beverage. And I wanted to share it with you.” 

Kaidan hoped he wasn’t blushing as he said that last part. 

But Shepard was just staring into the cup, swirling the hot liquid in her mug. He wasn’t even sure she had heard him. 

He let her sit there, not wanting to push the conversation any farther, knowing she would begin to talk when she was ready. Though hadn’t they come down here for his after-mission appraisal? 

He was just about to turn the conversation to the events of Noveria when Shepard spoke. 

“I don’t have any memories like those. Mindoir doesn’t have seasons,” she said simply, looking up when she said “Mindoir” and staring him straight in the eye.

_ “Shit. Shit, shit, shit, fuck, shit, fuck,” _ Kaidan thought wildy. _ “How the _ fuck _ did I forget she was the sole survivor from Mindoir? And you asked about her parents? You fucking idiot. She’s _Danielle Shepard,” he admonished himself. 

“Shepard,” he began, but she cut him off. 

“It’s okay, Kaidan,” she said. 

“I didn’t know-“ 

“It’s _ okay _,” she repeated. 

"But-“

“Kaidan,” she put a reassuring hand over his. His racing heart didn’t slow down at her touch, nor at the small spark that flew between them. 

_ “Just our biotics reacting to each other. Nothing you haven’t felt before,” _he reminded himself. But the feeling seemed to have paused the Commander’s thoughts as well. 

She tilted her head to the side, wonderingly. “Does it always feel like that?” she asked. 

“What? When biotics touch each other?” he asked. She nodded. “Yeah. Not _ exactly _ like that, but something similar. Did you not know that?” 

She shrugged dismissively. “I don’t touch many people,” she said, by way of explanation. “And I don’t think I’ve ever touched a biotic before.” 

Shepard then stood up, bringing her cup of coffee with her. “I should go. I have some paperwork I have to catch up on.” 

Kaidan found himself not wanting her to leave. “What about my thoughts on the mission?” 

Shepard gave him a brilliant smile, but turned toward her cabin. “I’ll get them another time. I’m sure we’ll talk again soon, Lieutenant.” She looked back over her shoulder. 

He stood up and was going to make his way over to her, but she gave him another one of her small smiles, and it stopped Kaidan in his tracks. He finally realized that those smiles, those small, soft ones, were her genuine ones, not the ones used for public appearances, but the ones she reserved for friends. 

“It’s nice that there was someone who didn’t know,” she said quietly. 

“Thank you for telling me,” he replied sincerely. 

She lowered her eyes, but then met his own a moment later with a strength that he didn’t often see from her outside of the battlefield. “Maybe you can show me those leaves sometime?” she asked softly. 

“I’d like that,” Kaidan said. She raised her mug in a small salute, then turned and walked into her cabin. 

The lieutenant sat down slowly, taking a small sip of his drink. He knew he was in trouble. He wanted to take the Commander home. He wanted to show her those autumn leaves. And he didn’t care how many regs it broke.


End file.
